Monday, May 16, 2016

Words From the Heart

Monday morning.

There is a quiet breeze. The air is cool, but the sun sends down a warm blanket to wrap us in. I feel grateful and quiet and humble and I feel so much love. Yes, my life is absolutely crazy and messy. But  I am having coffee, eating a vegan brownie and writing.  What is better than that??? For me, not much aside from 3 things:

1. Today is the 16th. My middle daughter is 23 months today and my sweet little baby is 6 months old today (let’s not leave out that my eldest is going to be 7 which is just so beyond crazy to imagine, though she was not born on the 16th like the two other critters). I cannot believe how fast time seems to pass, especially once you have kids over a year old.  It just blows by, it’s like you cannot seem to grab it fast enough to savor each day or memory. It slips right past you.  But, regardless of how fast or slow time seems to be moving, I am just so grateful to those little (and not so little) babies.  I never imagined I would have 3 girls.  I thought I would have one child in my lifetime.  Now I am blessed with 3 of my own, and 1 son I cherish as my own.  Watching them, sharing in their lives, is indescribable.  If it were not for them, I would not be who I am today. They bring me so much joy, grounding and unconditional love that words cannot even begin to express it all. That sounds so generic, and so overplayed by so many people, but its really true. And that’s why its overplayed!  I have had to outgrow my own shit to become something better for them.  And as a result of who I have become, I can appreciate all that they are and this incredible privilege of watching them grow into all that they are (and aren’t). I just love them with all of me.  Happy 23 months Arya Vesta and Happy 6 months Alessia Veda.  You 4 kids are the light of my life, and the love in my heart. I just adore each and every one of you and your unique spirits.  Thank you for blessing me and allowing me to be who I am to you and your journey through this crazy thing called Life. 

2. This brings me to another reason I am so humbled and grateful.  Today, my free Kindle book downloads hit 100.  Wow.  From 0 to 100 in 24 hours. I am beyond appreciative of whoever downloaded the book and I am in hopes that its messages reach you at the time you need them most, and deliver wisdom for your soul or healing or reflection that resonates with you at this time in your life. What you need, when you need it, how you need it! I hope my book reaches all those it is intended to, and that I can be used as a conduit for transformation and expansion into joy and fulfillment for those that read it.  I hope it touches you, as the journey (so personal and raw) touched me. It moved me. Transformed me. I wrote the book in early 2015, as an extension of (and aftermath of) a journal log I kept about my feelings and exploration of Self while entering a new relationship.  I chose to use obstacles and fear to catapult me into expansion, facing my deepest issues. If it was not for the great love I had for one special man, I wouldn’t be here today.  I would not have my beautiful baby Alessia, but I would also not have ME.  I would not be this version of myself that I have become. His presence in my life granted me the space I needed to safely explore myself, my fears, patterns, conditioning etc. and to push through to a whole new world of freedom and love and authenticity.  I am ever grateful to you, Harry (errr, Charlie H.), for holding that space for me. For being all that you are (and aren’t).  For being you.  And being here for me.  I love you more than words. 

3. Piggybacking on #2, I am so grateful for my family and friends, all the support I have received in my life. To all my readers, thank you!  I hope my story inspires you to create your own! To find love for yourself, to find joy and fulfillment and reach for your wildest dreams. For all the people that have come and gone, shaping my world to become what it is today. Thank you to all of you.  I love all of you. There’s more on this, and the rest in the book… today is the last day it’s FREE on Kindle.  Grab your copy and read more at  

#soblessed #somuchlove #sohumbled #thankyou #lovemylife