Thursday, December 8, 2016

What Would LOVE Do?

I invite you to stop frequently throughout the day today and question: What would Love do? Question your intentions, listen for the whispers of your Heart and Soul. Pause long enough to hear the silence as it speaks to you.

Angry at someone?  Ask yourself, what would Love do? How would you act if you were acting purely out of Love and not fear or ego? Would you still be angry?  Use this technique to uncover your real feelings and core issues that lie deep beneath the surface anger.

Frustrated with your life or a current situation?  Ask yourself, what would Love do? If you were to view this circumstance with eyes of Love and pure light energy, would you see it differently? Is there a way to find opportunity in this challenge presenting itself? Life happens for you, not to you.  Everything is a mirror, showing you ways you can grow and learn more about yourself. Is there a way you can find appreciation for your circumstance, rather than create more tension around it? Remember, your thoughts and beliefs become your tomorrow.

Feeling insecure or not worthy?  Ask yourself, what would Love do? How does God see you? How does your Inner Being, your Higher Divine Being see you? If you were to see yourself in this way, you would just fall in absolute love with all that you are (and aren’t).  Even your “flaws” are perfectly suited for your life’s mission(s) and purpose.  You are a masterpiece, crafted in pure Loving energy. The non-physical part of you just adores your “human.”  You’re quite a character, you know? Really.  You’re fabulous.  Start believing it.

Don’t have a Love life? Think again.  Be your own "Someone Special", first and foremost.  Give yourself the Love and attention you crave.  Teach others how to treat you by how well you treat yourself.  Then, extend that love out into the world through Kindness and Compassion.

Today (and everyday), try to appreciate all the Love that there is in your life, no matter how that looks: kids, friends, family, loved ones, spouses or significant others, animals, businesses, hobbies, passions… the list is endless.  Love takes so many different forms.  If we look close enough, we will see so many examples of how much Love we have right Now.  And don’t forget to take time to treat someone special (YOU) to some extra TLC. The world will be a brighter place: the better you feel, the bigger your shine. The bigger your shine, the greater positive impact you have on the whole of humanity. We all need you to continually ask yourself, what would Love do? 

As You Move Through Your Days, Be Gentle...

When you open your eyes in the morning, be grateful.  Be still.  Set an intention for the day, repeat a mantra or commit to working on something you struggle with.  Each day, maintain your baby steps towards a better you, to feeling better and reaching for those good feelings and thoughts. Try a little harder, but be loving towards yourself each step of the way. Stop beating yourself up over everything.  Be gentle.  You are a beautiful soul, and your expansion, transformation and self-development are a process. Everything takes time.

This physical life is very temporary. It's time to see who you really are and why you came here. To realize your brilliance, and allow it to shine. It is very wasteful to spend your days harboring bad feelings and limiting your expression of light and love. There is no value in that whatsoever and only brings pain. 

Check in with yourself throughout the day to see how you’re feeling, where you’re at, and how you can change directions if you’re struggling. 

Allow. Allow your love and passion to flow. Allow creativity to be born through you. Enjoy what is. And dream for more. Live an authentic life, practice freedom of expression in all forms. 

Respect your body for the incredible vehicle it is, it houses the most priceless gift of life. Move, walk, dance and sing. Have fun doing it.  Enjoy nature. 

Stop focusing so much on what's missing, and what doesn’t feel good. Start to feel good about what is (and isn’t) and how miraculous it all is. It is okay to not have it all right now. We always have what we need in each moment. There is beauty and love and abundance around us at all times.  All we have to do is open our eyes, and shift our focus and perception.

Practice acceptance and surrender (pseudo) control. Not everything means something. And not everything is personal. Meet challenges with Grace, and live with integrity. Be kind… to yourself, to others, to animals, to the Earth. We are all in this together.

When you go to bed at night, quietly reflect on the day.  What challenges did you face? What could you have handled more gracefully? What can you forgive yourself for, or someone else, to move towards true healing? What can you shed light and love on to transform and absolve for a fresh start tomorrow? Honor the gifts bestowed upon you, focus on what felt good, and intend to strive for your desires, again, when you rise for a new day.

Again, be gentle with yourself. And life. It's all a process. But it’s all so very magnificent.

Sunday, September 11, 2016

Wisdom from the Womb ( honor 9/11)

Presence is always the answer.
On days like today, the anniversary of 9/11 (Wow, where did 15 years go?), we often stop to remember… to find meaning amidst the chaos, to honor those lost, to celebrate their lives, and to be still and humble and vulnerable and full of love. 

But how quickly do we fall back into our old patterns? Most days, we are so consumed by our own human drama that we lose sight of the big picture and what matters most. We are stuck in a hamster wheel, obsessing over the past or worrying about the future. We play the same record of old stories we've told ourselves repeatedly and now believe. It's on loop. Playing and playing and playing, forever dictating our thoughts and actions. And consequently, our external lives. 

The cure to this madness, as we briefly experience on days like 9/11, is Presence. Presence is always the answer. It can - and will - bring us back to our heart-centeredness: that space inside us where we feel a deeper connection and meaning to all of life. A space where we move in sync to the One beating drum, the heart beat and pulse of All There Is, the natural rhythm and flow of existence. This is the place where we stand still, breathe, and honor life. 

Babies and children are masters at PresenceAnd they’re also great Teachers for us. They’re probably born with more wisdom straight out of the womb than we have and practice as adults! I have found that there is much to be learned from watching them as they journey through their first few years, in particular. They are definitely not stuck in some old story about the past. They are not all that concerned about what's for dinner tomorrow or the next day, or what may come to pass in the following days. For the most part, they are very grounded and anchored in to the Present moment.

It's a delight observing babies and children. For one, they absolutely revel in the newness of each experience and fully cherish every moment of it with all their senses. They want to touch and feel it, taste it, smell it, see it, hear it and explore all there is to it. They are very present and very aware of each moment they are living. And as a result, they are masters at other very important ways of being that lead to pure love, joy and fulfillment, such as:
  • Receiving: Little ones have absolutely no issue asking, and actually expect to receive plentifully! They're not shy about asking for what they want, and they are definitely not too proud to accept their granted wishes. Asking and receiving come very naturally to them.  They feel they are more than worthy, and in fact, they may not understand why you say “no!” As adults, we develop all sorts of “lack” language and stories as to why we cannot receive or why we can’t have something, or shouldn’t ask for it or expect it, but this is a non-serving and very limiting behavior and mind frame.  Each one of us deserves all that we desire. Ask and it is given.  Children understand this, and they know you must ask if you wish to receive! If you pay attention to kids for a while, you’ll come to learn how easily and effortlessly they give, ask, receive (and repeat) as a natural and instinctual way of being. 
  • Forgiveness: Kids do not generally hold onto anger or resentment or grudges.  Most times that something (perceived as negative) happens, a moment later they are off, happy, again, back to whatever they were doing or onto something new that interests them.  They rarely self punish, and forgive themselves almost instantly for whatever it is they have “done” (or said, or didn't do, etc.). Babies certainly don't understand hate or a lack of forgiveness. Their minds are very clear, and they have not yet had time to create attachments and meanings and stories about their surroundings and the people in it. Once a situation is gone, kids just let the thing go. They’re back to being “best friends” with the kid that knocked them down or stole their pencil. They’re back to playing after dishing out a bad attitude to Mom or Dad.  Once the moment is over, it’s over.  And they’re over it.  Wow, what a powerful way of being.  
  • Gentleness and Acceptance: Babies and children are gentle (with themselves and others) and overall, very accepting.  If they can’t reach the toy they want, they just keep trying. If they fall when they are learning to walk, they get back up and try, again, a moment later. You’re not going to catch a toddler beating himself up over the fact that he didn't poop in the potty today. Nor are you going to hear a young child say how “dumb” or “fat” or “worthless” they are just because they didn’t get something right the first time. They just accept where they’re at, what is, and move on with a gentle presence and grace. Think about how much happier we would all be if we could accept where we are at and just keep trying, again, with as much enthusiasm as the first time? 
  • Love: Babies and children are vulnerable and loving. They give with their whole hearts and are not afraid of getting hurt. They do not withhold their love, or guard it, (or pretend to love something they don't!) until they have learned over many years that perhaps being open is risky. Babies and children smile and laugh and hug and kiss and touch and play and give (and receive) openly and willingly and abundantly. They are so brave, so bold, and so beautiful. What a miraculous blessing, to witness love flowing freely to and from children and babies. No limitations. No boundaries. No walls being built to keep love in or out. Just a pure flow of pure love and light energy. 
  • Play: Kids do not take life too seriously. And they understand the importance of play! You’re not going to hear a child tell you that they can’t play just yet, they have to clean up their room first (maybe a select few tidy gems, but not the majority). Or that the day is ruined because it’s raining outside. Play is a creative expression of our imagination and our Self.  It is at the root of manifestation and an incredible attribute that children possess.  Play keeps us totally present in each new moment, and in touch with our creativity and inspiration (which means literally to breathe in and be filled with Spirit). 
  • Expressing Self: In addition to play, babies and children have no filter when it comes to expressing the Self. When they are upset, or scared, they cry.  When they are happy, they smile and laugh. They show their emotions and feelings verbally and physically and without censorship. They’re not embarrassed to fart or pick their nose, or if they fall or don’t win a game. They just haven’t learned judgment in that way yet, or to expect to be judged or nitpicked or disapproved of by others. In this way, they do not harbor bad feelings. And like forgiveness, they move through each moment without taking the past with them. They are unapologetically themselves, here and Now. If they feel like yelling, they don't care if you're at the supermarket or church.  If they want to cry, they're going to cry. If something is funny, expect a fully-body-and-belly laugh right then and there. Adults find this embarrassing sometimes. But really, it’s magical and beautiful.  
  • Intuition: Little ones are very sensitive to energy, observant and in-touch with their feelings. They haven't yet learned to question themselves. They know their bodies very well. They know when something doesn’t feel right. They know when the dog is sick. And they know when Mom and Dad are not happy. They’re much more empathic and intuitive, as they are closer to their Source energy and alignment than most adults that have learned conditioned behaviors and responses. Their receptors are “clean, shiny and new."
  • Observing: Children and babies observe without judgment or attachment. They see a thing for what it is, in the moment. They learn by using all their senses to gather information, and by using their intuition to feel it out. They also look to adults and the people around them to develop a sense of things. When a baby falls, she will stop and look to her parents for their reaction, before reacting herself. If they get scared, she will most likely cry. But if they laugh and clap, baby will most likely smile and laugh, too.  They see life with new eyes, and clear lenses. Everyday is a clean slate. 
  • Clarity: Children also see with clarity.  They have eyes of awe and wonderment. Everything is new and fresh and fun and exciting. They are enthusiastic, and open to seeing things for what they are and all they can be! Without judgments and attachments, they can see farther than us adults can with our narrow, limited view that is designed by our past experiences. Without bias, they can decide what they think and feel about a person or thing in real time, based on what they see, not what they think they “know” already. 
  • Optimism: The world is a treasure chest to babies and children. They do not seem to understand the concept that the world isn't full of endless and infinite possibilities and that they can do, have and be whatever it is they want… when they want it, how they want it and where they want it.  They have an abundant mindset. And this keeps them inspired, enthusiastic and energetic. And that inspiration then fuels their continued optimism and limitless, abundant-thinking. It's a very simple yet tremendous positive cycle of cause and effect. 
Unfortunately, as we all start to grow older, these powerful attributes become diminished by an increase in learned conditioning. We show less and less of ourselves, begin to build walls to guard our hearts, and start to self-loathe instead of self-love. But, our lives are so short and so precious and so meaningful that it does not serve us one bit to actually “grow up!” Kids have got it right. We should be listening to (and learning from) them

I was drying my hair yesterday morning.  My almost-10-month-old was on the floor nearby. When I turned the dryer on, her eyes grew in size. She stared at it, listened to it, observed my reaction as I lifted it to my head. She waited to see what reaction I would have to this very strange creature or contraption she had never seen before.  Remember, babies and children are not exposed to everything we have or use, and have absolutely no idea what most things are! So, she was very intrigued by the hair dryer. She kept coming closer, and maintained steady eye contact to make sure it was safe. I laughed and smiled, and she did the same. It became a pleasant association and experience for her. It was really touching to observe her as she observed me and the hair dryer and displayed most of the characteristics mentioned above, in just a short few minutes. It was beautiful being so present with her and sharing in this new moment with her.  And I didn't have space or time to think about something that happened to me, or what I am going to do about something in the future.  I enjoyed this moment and enjoyed my daughter. 

What better way to honor Life than to fully experience each moment, thereby living our full potential with every passing breath? By appreciating the beauty and wholeness? Connectivity, variety and contrast?

Today, on 9/11, I hope you reach some form of inner peace as you remember and celebrate those that have passed on from this life. And in their honor, celebrate your own life, as you're living it. Don’t push it off for tomorrow: a tomorrow that is unknown, and not guaranteed on this planet. All you've got is Now. And the answer to all of your problems is Presence (...and being a big kid!). 

A message from the collective consciousness of those lost: 

Do not waste your days, dear friends. Reach for fulfillment and totality. Revel in life and play and see with eyes like a babe.  Be open to receiving the gifts this wonderful world has to offer you. Listen to the whispers of your heart and soul. She will not lead you astray. Embrace each other. Share love and equality. Hold hands on this walk of Life and hold one another up. Make the most out of each moment in time. And be free. Free to express.  Free to love. Free to share. Honor one another. Honor your own light and divinity. Keep it close to your heart and let it guide your way. In peace, we leave you. Go. Be free, dear children. 

Sunday, August 28, 2016

[Audio blog] Good morning, Port Jeff...

CLICK HERE to listen to the Audio Blog 

...And slowly something awakens within us. Something intangible, but so very real. We yawn and shake off our slumber. And our eyes open wide to take in the new dawn and day. We are alive. Yes. Very much alive. 

Though there were so many creatures around, time and space felt quiet and still. People were walking their dogs and the dogs had smiles. Some were laughing after taking a swim, others just walked along politely. As an older woman said "hello," chills ran up my spine and through my arms and legs and I felt an inner peace and connectivity that words just cannot describe.  There were many boats on the water but the water was quiet and wrapped them with love and care. A blanket of morning  dew covered the flowers as they soaked up their drink of the sun. The trees stood tall and proud. I walked along in silent observation and realized how natural this was and how much beauty abounds and I had a gratitude-filled heart. My precious baby girl opened her eyes and silently observed, as well. She smiled and took it all in. After a few really hard weeks and relearning the incredible power of our mind, I was brought back to the every day miracles and cycles of life. There was no anger, no tension, just stillness and peace and calm and beauty. This feeling I shall remember and hold onto to keep me going. 

And I encourage you to find that in your every day moments and hold onto that as you move through this tremendous journey we call life. 

Allow yourself the priceless gift of presence. 

Wednesday, August 3, 2016

"Excuse me, ma'am, but I just must tell you..."

"Excuse me, ma'am, but I just must tell you..."

"Love is the vital core of the soul. And of all you see, only love is infinite." - Rumi
Those were the words I heard as my eldest daughter and I unpacked the cart to place on line at Whole Foods last night. The man paused a second.  He was an elderly man. He shook his head and finished, "God has really blessed you. He has really blessed you." He looked away and carried on with his order. He did not speak another word or glance over, again.

My heart swelled.  This was not the first time I heard this exact statement while being out with my girls (or the oh-so-common, "Wow, you've got your hands full").  At the supermarket.  And it was not the first time that same day I was sent a clear, divine message.  

My day was sprinkled with spiritual alignment and peppered with human junk. But let's not sugarcoat; I was having a difficult afternoon.  I decided to take the girls out to break up the day of being inside.  Yes, all 3. And I don't do that often, by myself. Usually it's just too much work and hectic packing and grabbing things and grabbing kids and rushing and forgetting something, to justify a quick trip out.  But, this time, I thought it would be nice. And I felt it was needed.

First, we went to Petco. One of the employees stopped us as we walked in the doorway to ask me if I needed any help. I told her we were just looking.  She told my eldest daugther she loved her dress.  As she walked away, my middle daugther said, "Do you love mine?"  The woman came back, laughing, and commented on her dress and her jewelry (she was adorned with the usual: multiple bracelets and a necklace). We smiled at eachother and the woman walked away.  A moment later, she appeared, again. She told me my children were so polite, so good. She said that every parent wonders if they're doing a good job. She told me I had done a great job so far, that it was evident in the way they spoke and acted. She may not realize, but those words, those two minutes she expressed something she witnessed as true and real for her, turned my entire day and night around. I felt really humbled. I felt appreciative. And I felt happy.  After she walked away, I smiled to myself and sighed, knowing she was a divine conduit, passing a message to me when I needed it. I felt the weights of the human junk, and the day, lift away and absolve into the illusions of time and space. 

Our time at the pet store was an absolutely incredible experience.  I allowed myself to be fully present, experiencing the animals with the kids.  It was so exciting.  The colorful beta fish, the geckos lying together slung in a tree branch, a chameleon hanging upside down from the top of the tank, the snake that followed our fingers along the glass, the ferrets curled up in balls snuggling, the hamsters and mice, the birds, the cats and the aisle of different fish.  Watching the girls as their eyes grew in wonder and awe instilled a sense of belonging, appreciation, adventure and love into my heart and filled my soul with a joy I cannot describe in words. Time seemed to melt away and absorb into a space that filled with realness and connectivity and good feelings. 

We left Petco and went to Whole Foods.  We grabbed a few random items and something to eat for dinner, and that's when we were met with the man on line ahead of us.  We ate there, stopped at a local garden center, picked out some sunflowers and a canna plant, and headed home. It was a quick trip out but it had a lasting impression on me.  

I was renewed, rebirthed and reinvigorated. It was then that I realized that things that seem like obstacles or challenges in our mundane daily lives are actually blessings and something to be grateful for.  Sure, it's hard raising 3 kids and all the sacrifices it takes. Having no personal time. Making difficult choices. Not sleeping (for years). It's physically and emotionally and mentally demanding and exhausting. This reminded me of the exercise I like to call, "What would you be without...?"  If I look at my day, and see it as challenging and something negative, I ask myself, what would I be without those things that make it hard? Well, without my kids? Life would be empty. I couldnt - and wouldn't want to - imagine life without them.  I would never trade my life with anyone else's.  Even tho it's unconventional, chaotic at times, and really hard a lot of days. But in moments of struggle, it's easy to "forget" the Truth. For ego to shadow out purity and love and alignment or connection to our Source.  We may lose sight of the blessings and the joy and the abundance we have been gifted with.  These 3 kids are my life, I am so honored and privileged to parent them. They're beautiful souls. And if I can remember that... remember how blessed I am... during the hard times, the hard times become transformed into beautiful ones.  Memories to cherish.  Moments of clarity. And I can gain the ability to see them for who they are as individuals. And guess what? As I opened to seeing them, they flourished. They literally blossomed before my eyes. They were happy. Receptive. Open. Playful. Caring. All of their amazing qualities came out, effortlessly, and we all shared a really pleasant time together. It was easy to appreciate them for all they are (and aren't). And to feel good.  As I became lighter, so did they.  It's so true that our children are often a mirror to our inner world. 

Yesterday's experience was a very important reminder to me, and I was touched by divine light and love, with "strangers" passing on angelic messages for me.  "See? We are here with you. Open your eyes. Keep going, Camille. It's all right. Everything is perfect. Do you see? Here is your validation. Your efforts are not in vain. Your hard work is paying off. Look at these beautiful children. So blessed, you are. There are people that would give up their life to have children, to experience this miraculous bond. We are here with you. We are here for you. You are never alone. You are always wrapped in love and safety and light. Remember to rise above, and See with eyes that are clear. Shed the physical, remain light. Remember Who You Really Are. You were created and infused with the same energy that created Worlds. Be present. Let your inner child play. Enjoy these moments. Enjoy every day.  Live full today... love full today... and everyday."

My God, I am so blessed. [shaking my head in wonder] And the "things" (or people or situations) that make life challenging are what make life sweet and worth living and experiencing. All we have to do in any given moment is shift our focus and our perception back onto the positives. I am beyond grateful for all the divine intervention that had a hand in making my yesterday a day to shake me from my slumber, undress me from my Human, and open my eyes, again, to the beauty of Spirit. And Love. To help me move past the growing pains I was experiencing and stuck in lately - stranded on a deserted and lonely plateau - to expand and emerge more excited and in-touch than ever before. 

Thank you to the folks that touched my heart and whispered to my soul on a random, ole' Tuesday on Long Island. I am certainly blessed. By all that surrounds me. 


Friday, July 22, 2016

[Audio Blog] It doesn't have to hurt to do the job...

It doesn't have to hurt to do the job....

CLICK HERE to listen to the Audio Blog (Please be patient with me through the first few minutes of the story!) 

Sunday, July 3, 2016

Audio blog on FREEDOM (from yourself!)

Please click here to listen to an audio blog about Freedom.

Freedom is being authentically you, unapologetically. It's having the choice to be whatever you want as you want it. This includes choosing happiness over discontentment.

Remember, you will always go in the direction you are facing. What are your eyes focused on? Gratitude? Challenges? Whatever you see, defined your experience. Perception is selective and solely based on what's inside. We see things and people as we are. Not as they are. And as such, this is how we experience life and feelings. Our thoughts determine our realities.

What thoughts do you choose to believe?

Point yourself towards something that feels good. And start moving that way.

Have an awesome holiday. Xo

Thursday, June 9, 2016

Gimme a sign: It's all about Confession

Photo Courtesy of Form and Funktion

I was sitting in the office of a local church, anxiously participating in my interview so I am able to baptize my daughter next month.  I was born into the Catholic faith, but over the years I have walked away from religion and towards love and spirituality.  Still, my other two girls are baptized, it means a lot to the family, and I do find value in the sacrament and tradition on several levels. 

In my jerky, nervous manner, I threw my hand up and one of the golden spinner rings on my most-favorite pinky ring went flying through the air.  I heard it hit the shelf behind me. The gold ring wraps around the larger silver ring that houses it, and is really very, very small. I knew it would be hard to find but once the interviewer stopped speaking, I got up to look for it.  After a few moments, much to my surprise, I found it.

I paused. "Let's see where it landed," I said to the woman.  (shaking my head) I laughed. The pamphlet it landed on was about the importance of confession. "Ah, confession," I said to her. She laughed and said, "must be a sign," after learning some basics about me and my very non-traditional life during the interview. I happened to agree with her on this one.

I'm all about taking and receiving signs and messages from the unseen. And this was no different.  Even though I don't believe in religious institutions anymore as a general rule, I can still receive messages anywhere I go.  It just so happens this pinky ring is very special to me.  The woman that handcrafts the jewelry is an absolute doll, someone I admire and love. Her jewelry carries with it the intention she infuses inside, for the wearer to feel empowered and unique.  Her Etsy Shop slogan is, jewelry that reflects the genuine youAnd I have to admit, I feel differently when I put on my rings she has made (I have a few! I love them!). I feel much better than when I am not wearing them.  My point? This jewelry is special to me, and lately I have noticed more and more how much it means to me and how it makes me feel. So losing the gold spinner ring just felt like I should take note as to why. 

Seeing as I assumed I didn't believe in "confession" in the way that the church does, I decided to google the word. I found a few definitions that stated confession was about admitting one's guilt of wrong doing or crime, shame or embarrassment.  Shame is one of the lowest level frequencies we can experience, it's like poison for our bodies and souls.  While I dont agree with admitting our "wrong-doings" in the sense that we are admitting we are "bad," I do agree we need to release ourselves from the guilt and shame we carry within us.  And this happens to be a message I have been receiving from multiple sources lately.  Forgiveness.  Absolution.  Confession is defined as a formal admission of one's sins with repentance and desire of absolution.

Well isn't that beautiful. 

In order to move forward in our lives, we need to free ourselves from the past and the heavy weight we carry around in the form of pain, guilt, shame and judgment. Let's finally face ourselves; give ourselves the opportunity to admit our feelings, to acknowledge them, feel them out and let them go (absolve them).  It's about acceptance and forgiveness.  We accept what has been, forgive ourselves, and move into what is right now in a whole, loving way.

This was yet another confirmation of the power of forgiveness and our choice in every moment to choose our thoughts and shape our lives.  

Perhaps we can all make it a regular "tradition" to Confess.  A sacred act of acceptance and forgiveness.  Just the kind of self-love we need to detox from the poisons we feed ourselves  to start fresh and light and free.  

Yes, little gold ring.  I may not be "religious," but I now see the importance of Confession in my own life and in my own way. And that's all it's ever about, finding ways to live authentically, navigating life on your terms and feeling good.  Finding love and light and freedom amid the "jungle" of human life. 

*Keep your eyes and ears open. Signs and messages fall upon us all the time.  Important messages will show up in a variety of ways and several times in a row, validating you are hearing something worth taking the time to reflect on.  

Monday, May 16, 2016

Words From the Heart

Monday morning.

There is a quiet breeze. The air is cool, but the sun sends down a warm blanket to wrap us in. I feel grateful and quiet and humble and I feel so much love. Yes, my life is absolutely crazy and messy. But  I am having coffee, eating a vegan brownie and writing.  What is better than that??? For me, not much aside from 3 things:

1. Today is the 16th. My middle daughter is 23 months today and my sweet little baby is 6 months old today (let’s not leave out that my eldest is going to be 7 which is just so beyond crazy to imagine, though she was not born on the 16th like the two other critters). I cannot believe how fast time seems to pass, especially once you have kids over a year old.  It just blows by, it’s like you cannot seem to grab it fast enough to savor each day or memory. It slips right past you.  But, regardless of how fast or slow time seems to be moving, I am just so grateful to those little (and not so little) babies.  I never imagined I would have 3 girls.  I thought I would have one child in my lifetime.  Now I am blessed with 3 of my own, and 1 son I cherish as my own.  Watching them, sharing in their lives, is indescribable.  If it were not for them, I would not be who I am today. They bring me so much joy, grounding and unconditional love that words cannot even begin to express it all. That sounds so generic, and so overplayed by so many people, but its really true. And that’s why its overplayed!  I have had to outgrow my own shit to become something better for them.  And as a result of who I have become, I can appreciate all that they are and this incredible privilege of watching them grow into all that they are (and aren’t). I just love them with all of me.  Happy 23 months Arya Vesta and Happy 6 months Alessia Veda.  You 4 kids are the light of my life, and the love in my heart. I just adore each and every one of you and your unique spirits.  Thank you for blessing me and allowing me to be who I am to you and your journey through this crazy thing called Life. 

2. This brings me to another reason I am so humbled and grateful.  Today, my free Kindle book downloads hit 100.  Wow.  From 0 to 100 in 24 hours. I am beyond appreciative of whoever downloaded the book and I am in hopes that its messages reach you at the time you need them most, and deliver wisdom for your soul or healing or reflection that resonates with you at this time in your life. What you need, when you need it, how you need it! I hope my book reaches all those it is intended to, and that I can be used as a conduit for transformation and expansion into joy and fulfillment for those that read it.  I hope it touches you, as the journey (so personal and raw) touched me. It moved me. Transformed me. I wrote the book in early 2015, as an extension of (and aftermath of) a journal log I kept about my feelings and exploration of Self while entering a new relationship.  I chose to use obstacles and fear to catapult me into expansion, facing my deepest issues. If it was not for the great love I had for one special man, I wouldn’t be here today.  I would not have my beautiful baby Alessia, but I would also not have ME.  I would not be this version of myself that I have become. His presence in my life granted me the space I needed to safely explore myself, my fears, patterns, conditioning etc. and to push through to a whole new world of freedom and love and authenticity.  I am ever grateful to you, Harry (errr, Charlie H.), for holding that space for me. For being all that you are (and aren’t).  For being you.  And being here for me.  I love you more than words. 

3. Piggybacking on #2, I am so grateful for my family and friends, all the support I have received in my life. To all my readers, thank you!  I hope my story inspires you to create your own! To find love for yourself, to find joy and fulfillment and reach for your wildest dreams. For all the people that have come and gone, shaping my world to become what it is today. Thank you to all of you.  I love all of you. There’s more on this, and the rest in the book… today is the last day it’s FREE on Kindle.  Grab your copy and read more at  

#soblessed #somuchlove #sohumbled #thankyou #lovemylife